Went to the doctor today. Got a full battery of STI tests.

"So I'm going to suggest an HIV blood test," she said. "Just to make sure."

"Yes," I said.

"You mentioned you didn't like needles," she prompted.

"Yes," I said. We stared at each other for a long moment.

"Blood tests mean needles," she said, finally.

"Yes," I said.

"Is this, like, fainting and throwing up don't like needles?" she asked.

"No," I said. "I'll just cry." I was already on the edge of tears, thinking about it.

"Oh." She sounded surprised. "Okay." I don't think she's ever encountered a patient who just cried. Not many people have.

Fear is fear is fear, but I won't let fear get in the way of my health.

Anyway, things went well enough, and I didn't even cry that much. Results come in in a week, and because I had the HIV test as well, I have to go down to get my results in person.

I really, really doubt I'll have HIV, but you never know, right? Better check it out, just to be sure.

Ugh. My arm hurts. Also my cervix.

That was Unpleasant, with a capital U.

.

~Rosie.

Before&After