Whelp, after all that bitching, my period came, and was the most normal one I'd had in months.

I feels good to be bleeding properly again.

In other news, my stress level has been THROUGH THE ROOF.

I am a mess. Physically, mentally, emotionally.

G called last week. Talked for an hour and a half.

I had patched up that hole in my heart very neatly, I think. So neatly, that when Kelly asked about that boy I was stressing over when she was staying with me, I asked: "Who?" and only after a moment's thought realized who she was referring.

Now?

My bandages, effectively staunching the flow of heart blood, are ripped off, and the whole thing hurts all over again.

I just cried my way through Sex and the City, the movie. How pathetic is that?

I don't know what to do about G. He never really said what he wanted. I think he's trying to get me to forgive him, because he didn't realize how many good (and powerful) friends I have.

He got a somewhat chilly reception at the last event he went to, and had a bit of a 'talking to' with a couple of my friends.

He makes me so angry, and yet, when I was crying at that stupid movie, I was really crying over him.

He asked me to go to a big event in his area in January. Told me that I won't have any idea on the impact I had in his life until I hear it from other people.

It's a valid point, but still.

I was already considering going, because I have to attend the Prince and Princess. And on the bright side, I'd have the Prince's sword on my side, and that of his considerable squire family.

And if the Princess tells the local retinue that she wants G kept away from her and me, they will do it.

Powerful friends are good friends to have. Good friends are powerful to have.

It all hurts too much, and now I'm posting at quarter past one in the morning, when I should be sleeping.

I bet sleep will make me feel better.

Won't it?

.

Rosie.

Before&After