Note to All Employers Everywhere:

Hi.

I'm Rosie.

I hate my work.

Mostly because my boss doesn't follow (in my opinion) the Golden Rules of Employers.

These are the Sacred Golden Employer Rules:

1.) Treat your staff like human beings. Equals. R-E-S-P-E-C-T. I want a little of that, sugar. You may write the paychecks and make the scheduals, but you're still prone to mistakes, you're still human, just like everyone else.

2.) Happy staff means staff that stays. Smile once in a while. Small talk goes a long way. Care, or at least act like you care. Remember, these people carry your business on their shoulders.

3.) You need them as much as they need you. It costs you to retrain staff. It doesn't cost them anything to quit. Remeber this. Your whole business is like a castle of cards. Both sides need each other to be successful. Treat your counter-cards well and they're stick around and try their best to keep everything in place.

4.) If you have a problem with one of your staff, talk to them about it. Don't stay quiet then bad-talk them behind their back. IT DOESN'T HELP. Trust me. It just causes hurt and bitterness, just like if you went behind the back of one of your friends and they found out.

5.) Don't be a fucking cheap ass. Seriously. Give a little. Even if it's just a little. Free coffee for the whole staff? Did you think about the other fifty percent of your staff who doesn't drink coffee? Supply bulk tea. It's approximately 5 cents a bag, which honestly is probably a lot cheaper than coffee. Make sure everyone is included.

6.) Trust. If a staff member doesn't feel trusted, that can often lead to unrest. Do you have any actual *reason* to be untrustworthy of this staff member, or are you being paranoid? If it's not justified, ease up a little. If it is justified, talk about it. If the problem can't be resolved, lay them off. Fire them. What ever. Just trust your staff a little. That is what you hired them for.

The Six Golden Rules. Think about them. They do make sense in a strange way.

Before&After