What a weird year. Definately a year of change.

It's taking some getting used to. It's strange not being with Loren on New Year's Eve.

It's strange not being with Loren, period, but here is not the place to talk about such things.

Unfortunately.

Sometimes I really wish I'd kept this journal completely private. On the other hand, this is a good way to keep up to date on Rosie News.

A quick recap of the year:

January: Unemployed. Depressed.

February: Still unemployed. Still depressed. Working on getting neck corsets together.

March: Still unemployed. Still depressed. Still working on neck corsets, but they're going nowhere. I'm broke, tired, and spending a lot of time alone at home.

April: Get hired at the mall as cleaning/security. It's fucking HARD. My feet are covered in blisters, but it's good to be working again.

May: Get a job offer at the Capitol Theatre. Decide to go part-time at the mall so I can work at the theatre as well.

June: Start my Capitol job. It's good, but just as hard as my mall job. I work out a rhythm for cleaning the theatre, and it works okay.

July: I have no days off. I'm miserable, and tired. I've nearly worn through the bottom of my shoes with walking at my jobs. I decide I want to move to Calgary. My mother decides to help me. Loren doesn't seem to decide anything.

August: I pack my things, I gather my money, I make my arrangements. I drag my heels. Loren doesn't try to stop me, and that's both a relief and a dissapointment. C'est la vie. I leave.

September: I have sporratic work. I spend a lot of time watching Tyne's movie collection, painting my nails, and making a mess in the kitchen (much to Tyne's roommate's dismay).

October: Work picks up. I'm doing good. The money my parents gave me is gone, but I'm doing just fine. I get a call from Red Deer College, offering me work for November. Painting. I am elated.

November: A blur of painting, sleeping, and drinking a lot of Coke. Staying with Colleen. Really broke, but happier than I've been in a long time. I work hard, and I wasn't always happy, but neither was I depressed. It was good.

December: I work the first two weeks, and then come here to Nelson to visit. It's...I don't know. I find myself jealous of the girls that are suddenly hanging around Loren. It's hard not to be. They're prettier than me, and fresher than me. I'm an old hat. An old katamari hat, but an old hat nonetheless. It hurts a lot.

DAMN FEELINGS. I should just do away with them altogether.

*le sigh*

I think Candace and Kristal and I are going sledding tonight, and then drinking at my place.

Hooray! Like high school days.

Yeah, what ever.

.

Rosie.

Before&After