Well, fuck.

I hate feeling guilty and ashamed.

See, currently I'm an elevator operator.

First, one of the big bosses caught me texting while I was running the elevator. I should have known better, is the stupid thing (and it was only the second time, maybe, that I'd run the elevator with my phone open). But still, shouldn't have done it.

Fine.

I've been leaving my phone in my locker, or resisting the temptation to touch it (beyond checking the time). It's been alright.

Do note, elevator position is fucking boring.

It's sit, sit, sit, sit, FLURRYOFCRAZYACTIVITYANDYELLING, sit, sit, sit, sit.

So I've been reading while I've been sitting...except some of the pauses are so long that I start thinking and reading at the same time, and not listening to the people on headset. I've fumbled two cues.

The crew chief today, while making announcements at the end of the call, added that 'no books were allowed'. I'm sure I turned red with shame.

At least the other elevator operator has a book of sodoku puzzles, as does one of the guys up top. But still, I knew it was directed at me.

I feel terrible. I should have known better. I should have been better.

The most I can do now is never do it again.

.

Rosie.

Before&After