Stampede is DONE! No more!

It rained hard enough that the motorcycle guys skipped their act twice more.

Otherwise, it was good shows all around. By the end, we were PERFECT. The group of us in the elevator room got so efficient, we spent a lot of time goofing off and chatting with the performers.

I got pretty frustrated with people towards the end, because everyone was relaxing too much. What I mean is, they'd linger in the elevator room while we were trying to move set pieces around, so I had to do some yelling to try and clear spaces in front of barreling set pieces.

I don't like yelling, but I'm damned well going to if people are in my way when I'm moving shite. Or if they try and get off the elevator before I turn the 'all clear' light on.

Bitches.

There was one guy who, after I yelled at him to halt when he was moving towards the edge of the elevator, looked at me, smiled, and intentionally stepped off the elevator.

He's damned lucky we were at a point were tripping the sensors wasn't going to shut down the motor on the elevator. If he *had* shut down the motor, I would have torn a strip off him, be he twice my age or not.

Intentionally disobeying instructions is not something I appreciate.

Anyway. It was a good run.

I'm glad it's over, though.

In other news, my parents came to visit. Or rather, they were passing through and wanted to sleep on my floor, so I let 'em. :P

They passed through on their way to a drawing thing in Red Deer, then again on their way back. On the way back they stopped for a full day, Saturday.

Unfortunately for me, it was the weekend of the SCA event Dragonslayer, in which the archery and the heavy champions are chosen.

The ex was the Dragonslayer champion. If I'd been able to go to the whole event, I would have had to accompany him into court as his former inspiration.

I'm glad I had to work.

The thought of touching him again is repulsive. Not because I hate him, but because of the memories that touching him would bring up.

Anyway, I talked my parents into going to the event with me for a few hours in the morning so I could shoot in the championship. It wasn't so much the championship I cared about, but rather I wanted to see my friends, and I wanted to shoot a bit.

So everyone who's shooting for champion goes up and declares their intention, handing over a single arrow to her Excellency, Baroness Wilma.

When it was my turn, I went up and made a short speech that went something like the following:

"Your Excellencies," said I, sweeping a curtsey. "I traveled long and I traveled far and I went to Lionsgate--" Vancouver, for those who don't know SCA geography. :P "--and I discovered they smelled." (At which point his Excellency Beothuk was heard to giggle and mutter something to the effect of: 'I've met their Baron. Stinky bastard.') "So I am sticking around here for a bit, and would very much like to shoot for your championship."

At which point there was much hugging and 'Did I hear that right? You're staying?'s. They gracefully accepted my arrow of intent.

Anyway, the archery tournament was fun.

There were four targets. You had to hit a certain area on each target before moving on to the next. Each got progressively harder and harder and were worth more points, ending with the 'dragon's eye' which was about the size of a CD and stuck on a pole, about twenty to thirty yards away.

The first target was the face of a cyclops. Each hit to the head was worth one point, each hit to the eye was worth five, and each hit to the pupil was worth ten.

You had to hit the eye anywhere to progress to the next round.

I hit the eye with two arrows first try. I was one of the only two to move on first round. The rest of the arrows sunk into his head, so I got a few points that round.

I was just damned lucky.

The second target was a hydra with five heads. Each body shot was worth two points, and each head shot was worth ten. You had to shoot two heads IN THE SAME ROUND to make it to the next target.

I got stuck on this one. I consistently shot at least one head (and the last round -- there were five -- I hit two; frustrating!), and rarely missed the body.

My friend James passed me quickly. The third target was a clout. Or rather, it was a circle of cardboard waythefuck in the distance (forty yards, I think, maybe more). To pass this one you had to get a single arrow in the clout (it was that hard), but each arrow was worth at least twenty points.

If you passed the clout, the dragon's eye was next, and it was worth eighty points each time you hit it (in practice afterwards, James nicked the eye).

So anyway. We shot and shot and shot.

Finally, it was done, and my parents were getting grouchy and impatient for coffee.

I promised them, only two minutes to say my goodbyes! Some of them were hello-nice-to-see-you-I'm-going-now-goodbyes.

I would have liked to stick around, but there was nothing left for me until court.

The ex was odd. He comes up to groups I'm standing in (twice in the few hours I was there) and tries to make conversation, but is very weird about it. Usually I just mumble an excuse and duck away from the group, to go talk to someone I'd rather talk to.

I wonder why he doesn't get the hint.

I still want to play speedbag with his balls.

Fortunately, I had the excuse of having to shoot to duck away.

Anyway, as I'm saying my goodbyes, Beothuk pops up next to me, asks me to stay a few minutes because they were going to do a quick presentation to Tim (another archer), and then asks me how to pronounce my name.

I should know better than to trust Beothuk when he asks things like that.

I have an inkling something is going to happen.

But I talk to my parents and they grudgingly agree to stick around for five more minutes.

So quickly, the court of their Excellencies Beothuk and Wilma is opened right there on the archery range.

Aethelred, the former Dragonblinder champion, does some talking about the tournament and what have you.

"And your new Dragonblinder is...Marie de Monte!"

And, elegant as I am, the first words that drop out of my mouth are: "You're shitting me?!"

But no, they pull me up in front of the impromptu court, and there I am, on my knees in front of Their Excellencies, with Aethelred laying the baldric of the championship over my shoulder.

And the quiver of the championship.

And the necklace of the championship.

And the scroll of the championship.

And the bracer of the championship.

Whew!

I was aghast, I was surprised, I was weighed down by everything around my neck.

While hugging Their Excellencies, Beothuk murmured: "We expect great things from you, Marie."

Egads! Great things! I don't know if I can aspire to great things. The most I generally do is aspire to better things than the things I've done before.

I felt a bit bad for winning the championship, though, because I will be a largely invisible champion (though I don't want to be).

Silent, never, but invisible, yes.

Also I felt bad for my friend James. I know James really wanted the championship, and he's a better archer than me. If he had got any arrows in the clout, he would have won hands down.

But seriously. I was up against grand master bowmen and master bowmen ('men' being a loose term, here).

And there I was, little miss doesn't-have-a-glove, doesn't-have-a-quiver, never-shot-a-royal-round, I go in and take the championship.

How the hell did that happen?

I felt a little bit better later when Gareth (a former Dragonblinder champion and, I believe, a grand master bowman) said I matched his score in the shoot (he wasn't going for champion, he was just shooting).

Well, maybe I *kind* of deserve it. I still feel a little aghast at snatching the championship from under Jude, James, Lianor and Argent's nose. They're all better archers than me; I just got stuck and lucky.

Anyway, I was surprised and pleased and a little worried (about the invisible part).

I am trying to renegotiate my contract for next year (I'm planning to go back to Lunchbox), but I don't know how it'll go. I want to and I don't want to go back there.

*sighs*

Well, we'll see what happens.

Right now I have to go to the fabric store and buy me some green fabric. Their Excellencies asked me, if I had time, to make them a green lobster for a prank they want to pull on Their Majesties (I think it was).

Hooray for pranks and fabric stores!

Time for me to off.

Be well, all you Interweb peoples.

.

Rosie.

Before&After