I'm kind of see-sawing between happy and unhappy right now.

And I still can't put my finger on it.

I'm not desolate. I feel better than I did a couple days ago, but I'm on the down swing again.

Loren invited me to a getogether thingie tonight, but I decided not to go. It was going to be similar to last Saturday, and I don't want a repeat. I went over to Candace's instead.

It was nice. We had dinner and I played Animal Crossing while she alternately slept on the couch and poked at her gerbil, Georgio.

I wish I could put my finger on the problem. It's frustrating. It's a million things, it's nothing. I don't know what exactly it is. It's complicated.

It took me about a year to figure out why I left Mike.

But I don't want to leave Loren, not now.

I don't know. I'll figure it out.

On a lighter note, we finally broke our near two-week dry spell. It was very nice. I want it again tonight, but I don't know if I'll get it.

It's a pity his sex drive is so low, and mine is so high. Though I did warn him when we met.

I'm tired. I'm mentally and physically tired.

It may all have something to do with the fact that I float around, rather than having a permenant residence. My stuff is at my parents', I sleep at Loren's (but I don't hang out there, per se), and I spend most of my days at Judy and Janette's. And I mean, a *lot* of days.

*le sigh*

I don't know what will help. But I know I'll figure it out.

Cross your fingers for me, or pray for me, or burn a candle for me, or what ever it is you do. I think I'm going to need it in the next month.

.

Rosie.

Before&After