It's 3am, and the snakes have moved in. I'm playin' for four drunks, and me.

But the beer is cold, and the memory's old, and the lights are so bright I can't see.

I wish I could write music. It seems like a perfect outlet. You can convey so much, so much.

As it is, I will just sing other people's music and wish I could play an instrument.

~

I was at the library today, shuffling through books on metalworking.

And what fell into my lap?

'How To Make Money Using Etsy'

I didn't check it out.

~

I went to a physiotherapist today, to deal with my leg. She dug into my butt muscle really hard, but it's feeling better.

I don't want to be old before I'm old.

She also prescribed yoga, which I kinda knew already. The community center has it for only six dollars, on mondays.

I'm going to have to go.

~

Do you know the spoon theory, for energy?

There are days that I feel like I have less spoons than other people.

And some of my spoons are actually forks.

I have dug myself into so many grooves in my life, I don't even notice the walls anymore.

~

Sometimes my left ring finger tingles, like I've just taken of a ring that I've worn for a long time.

And for a split second I freak out, wondering where I dropped the ring.

And then I remember: I have no ring.

I don't know why it feels like that.

I wonder if in some alternate universe, or many alternate universes, I am married, and it's the echo of that making it's way through.

And I rub the base of the finger with my thumb, but the feeling doesn't really go away.

It only started this year. It's weird.

~

Fuck I'm tired.

Lonesome, I know you well.

.

~Rosie.

Before&After